Jodi Speaks Her Mind

 

More delays 9/24/2005

Filed under: Adoption Journey — jodi @ 3:14 pm

Well, here is the brief synopsis. We still do not have a final court date. Instead, we have a second preliminary hearing on October 4. At that hearing, a final court date will be set. Then when all courts are done, there will be a ten-day wait. We are still about a month away from bringing Adelina home.

We know that God is good, and we are trusting in Him and His timing. But we are also broken-hearted as we watch Adelina cry and scream on the floor every time we have to leave her. All we can ask is for your prayers that God will protect her fragile heart and emotions until He opens the door for us to bring her home.

Thanks…

 
 

A Divine Appointment 9/22/2005

Filed under: Adoption Journey — jodi @ 12:40 pm

I had to post about this right away! We just came from a visit with Adelina. While at her orphanage, I met an American woman named Kim with a wonderful story to share. She lives here with her Ukrainian husband and is working with a ministry called The Father’s House. They are opening up a home for street kids in another part of the city, but she and her husband live close to Beriozka (Adelina’s orphanage). Kim was there just to volunteer and help out as needed. We got to talking and she was looking at Adelina and commenting on how beautiful she is. I mentioned she was hard of hearing and Kim suddenly remembered that she had met Adelina before. A group had come through in the summertime connected with the Father’s House ministry. They met Adelina and felt led to pray for her. She says they prayed for her for about an hour and that they really enjoyed spending this time with Adelina. She then told me that there was a picture of Adelina on their website from this visit! I just visited this site, and the picture is found on this page here. Scroll down to the section called “The Baby House”, and you will see Adelina in the last picture in the collection (bottom right). Also, the picture on the bottom row far left is her group-mate Masha, who is a real sweetie.

Anyhow, we were so encouraged to hear that Adelina had been prayed for by this group of believers, and we hope to spend some more time with Kim and her husband. God is so good!!

 
 

“Click” 9/18/2005

Filed under: Adoption Journey — jodi @ 1:35 pm

Adelina is really amazing! I am really excited to share with you how things are going with her. On one hand, we are getting incredibly tired of doing the exact same activities with her day after day after day. There is only so much to do on a small property, especially when you are not permitted access to all the toys and such. Still, we are beginning to see now why God orchestrated things for us to have this extra time with Adelina here with these limitations.

Adelina up to now has had very little language exposure. Because of her hearing aid, she has been exposed to some sound and speech, basically from any of 16+ caregivers, speaking Ukrainian or Russian in a number of voices and accents all with 14 other children making their crying, giggling, and other noises kids make. Mostly she just gets by because her life is so routine. She knows what is expected and is able to meet those expectations, however minimal they may be.

It had been emphasized to us that Adelina can hear and speak, so we spent the first couple of weeks encouraging her to vocalize and introducing her auditorily to as many words as possible. In particular, we have a Baby ABC book we have been sharing with her from the beginning, but she has never really shown much interest in it. All in all, the results were discouraging. She did not want to speak with us, and it is pretty clear now that her vocabulary truly is limited to maybe 2-3 words. The rest of her vocalizations are unintelligible baby-talk. So we decided to try signing, and the results speak for themselves.

We started with mommy, daddy, please, and thank you and then moved on to the activities she most enjoys - swing, slide, play; and the items most important to her, namely the little purse we bought for her and the few contents it has, each of which was a gift from us to her. At first she seemed reluctant and didn’t seem to want to bother with signs, but we kept at it, and eventually she was using them a bit more freely, though usually still requiring prompting (except for please). Lately, we have had the occasional visit where she seems much more “into” the signing. We made up a game where gets a tiny treat if she can sign the items in her purse. Then yesterday, we taught her some more signs and she was really enjoying them. She was starting to focus on getting her hands right, and we were really amazed! We also made up some flash cards with the names of items or activities and she is learning those pretty quickly.

Then, we pulled out the ABC book, and it happened: she started pointing to each thing in the book and looking at us expectantly, waiting for us to show her how to “say” that word. We were so excited we were nearly beside ourselves! Of course, we didn’t know many of the signs so we will soon be trying to learn the sign for every item in that little book, but it was the “light bulb” moment we had been waiting for. She is finally understanding that this is communication and that almost everything can have a sign.

The blessing in all of this is that we will be the first people she will truly communicate with besides pointing and babbling. What a joy it will be when she starts to sign of her own initiative. The challenge which lay before us is the need to learn this language ourselves as smoothly and quickly as possible, but it is clear that we would not be able to do this if we were home already. We simply would have too many other things demanding our attention, and Adelina would most likely give her first words and sentences to a sign language/preschool teacher.

So that is our latest on our amazing Adelina. We are now almost grateful for the repetition in the activities because it has made the communication that much more clear, and it has given us a limited range of words/signs to have to learn for starters. We will keep you updated on our progress as well as Adelina’s.

 
 

Court Status and Kiev Life

Filed under: Ukraine, Adoption Journey — jodi @ 1:31 pm

The current court situation is such that things appear to finally be moving forward, albeit slowly. We have a preliminary court hearing this Friday, Sept. 23, but this is still not our official “court date.” Evidently, the new code requires TWO court appearances, but only the second is really significant. This more official court date will, God-willing, take place 7-10 days after the preliminary hearing. Then, there could still be a 30-day wait imposed OR the new code might instead have a mandatory 10-day wait, which cannot be waived. At this point, we are just trying to take it one day at a time and to trust the Lord with the timing of everything. It seems dangerous at any time to start planning a departure. We are about to change our plane tickets home for the second time, and once again we will have to “estimate” a departure date. Sigh Obviously, your prayers for expeditious proceedings are requested!!

As for our life here, we have adapted pretty well. We are pleased with our new apartment, which at least has a washing machine so we do not have to hand-wash our clothes. We aren’t too far from Adelina with about 35-40 minute commute made up of walking, bus ride, metro ride, another bus ride, and then more walking. Of course reverse this for the return trip. This is a pretty typical Ukrainian commute.

We have found a collection of eating establishments that offer us a choice in cuisines, and we have even found a Mexican and an Indian restaurant for those nights when we want something extra special! Generally speaking, we really like Ukrainian food, so that is certainly not a problem. Much of the food we will miss when we come home, especially good Borshch and these tasty things we’ve discovered near the metro close to the orphanage that are sort of like “fritters”. They are deep-fried pastries with stuff inside them, and our favorite is a sweet version with something like apple pie filling in it. YUM! Oh, and they only cost the equivalent of 20 cents!

Our new location is within walking distance of the YWAM base, where we can occasionally use their internet access as well as fellowship with other YWAMmers and a fairly good number of Americans (or at least English speakers). We attended their “family night” last Thursday, and they blessed us by praying for us. Boy, was that refreshing!! We have also become pretty good friends with another U.S. adoptive family that is here. They are also adopting a girl in the Kiev region, and we’ve been meeting for dinner off and on for the past 3 weeks. They are staying not too far from us, and it is so nice to have this growing friendship while here. We are all excited to meet the others’ new daughter!!

I guess that sums up our current lives. We really do miss home and hope God will open the doors so we can bring our precious Adelina home soon. In the meantime, we are going to keep on keeping on. Thanks for following along!

 
 

Living in Limbo 9/13/2005

Filed under: Adoption Journey — jodi @ 1:16 pm

This will have to be kept reasonably short. I will sum up what has been happening here:

  • We have moved to a new apartment (with washing machine and without cockroaches - yeah!)
  • Adelina continues to be wonderful, and we love her more and more every day!!
  • We have shifted from focusing on trying to get her to speak to encouraging her to sign. We have gotten good results from this so far! She is already using a few signs without prompting but enjoys imitating others and seems quick to understand so long as we are consistent and using them in context. Biggest problem with this plan is that neither of us are particularly skilled signers. We have looked up several words online, but now we have limited internet access. Still, this is a step in the right direction, and we are thrilled so far with the prospect of being able to communicate with Adelina and her with us very soon.
  • Her hearing aid is finally fixed. The problem was elusive for awhile but was at last identified and remedied. She is hearing better and for the first time indicated once that her hearing aid wasn’t working right. This is wonderful, as it seemed before like she didn’t care if she had it or didn’t have it.
  • No progress towards court yet. The judges still don’t know how to implement the new procedures here. Please pray for a resolution to this problem, as we feel we are living here indefinitely at present.
  • We are tired - physically, emotionally, and spiritually. We need refreshment especially in our relationships with God. Please pray accordingly.

I think that’s about it for now. Hopefully we’ll have news soon.

 
 

She is SO worth it!! 9/8/2005

Filed under: Adoption Journey — jodi @ 10:31 pm

On Top of the World

It is definitely time for an Adelina update. Today we were reminded why we are here, and we are feeling so much better as we reflect on how blessed we feel through her. She is so full of life and joy and curiosity and wonder. Her personality is blossoming left and right, and she is so content with us. We feel so privileged to be allowed to parent her even if on a very limited basis right now.

In addition to all of that, she is starting to communicate more freely with us. We have been told that she speaks words - Mama, Papa, Adela. But we have never heard these words per se (well, once we think we heard her say “mama” in reference to us to one of her caregivers, but we aren’t totally sure). What we have heard more and more is vocalization to get our attention (and lots and lots of hearty laughter). Her vocalizations are most often something like “Mah!” or just a yell of some sort. Also, if she sees something new, amazing, or exciting (like pictures on the computer) she sort of does a kind of excited form of baby-talk while pointing. We have tried to get her to understand some signs, but up until recently, we have failed at this. Finally, however, Adelina has picked up the sign for “please,” which is particularly useful because without it she doesn’t get the toy she is asking for or the treat mommy or daddy is ready to give her. There is powerful meaning in a desire for something, and with this assistance, she has learned her first sign. She is also working on “thank you”, which she does while muttering two syllables that we think are mimicking the two syllables in “thank you”. We are of course speaking the words while teaching the signs, but the past two days her hearing aid hasn’t been working, so the signing is that much more useful. All in all, we expect she will most likely dwell in the “hearing world”, but basic signs are useful with all children, and they will help her with her language development skills (we hope). If she ends up having difficulty learning to speak, we can pursue sign as her primary language, but we’ll have to see how things progress once we get her home.

Adelina is also exploring cause and effect in her world, especially as it pertains to sound. This is really encouraging as well. What we suspect is that while she had the ability to hear for the past year, she has had very few opportunities to learn how to focus on what causes sounds and how to make sounds herself. When she is with the other children, she is probably unable to differentiate sounds. There is constant noise from the young, needier children who cry a lot as well as bang or just make noise as kids are known to do. There are 15 children in her group, so it is always noisy. But with us, she is separate and we can explore things together. We learned that the light switch in the lobby not only turns on the lights, but it makes a nice clicking sound. There is a piano she likes to play (wonderfully loud). Also, if you looked at the pictures, you saw how she loves to pound her feet on the elephant slide, which is all metal. It makes loud booming sounds. She will then sit down and continue to kick her heels on the slide, which makes another booming noise. This is also where she first learned that yelling to us could make us turn around and give her our attention. All in all, she is at the baby stages of sound exploration and “baby talk”, but that is okay with us. The reading we did about speech development indicates that all children go through the same stages, though at different rates. Adelina has adequate intelligence (as far as we can tell), but is just now exploring sound in many ways for the first time. She seems to really enjoy it, and we hope she will pick up on things quickly as they begin to make more sense to her, especially once we have her full time, and all that noisy “static” will be dramatically reduced. As she gets more acquainted with sounds, she will be able to distinguish between background noise and close up speech and so on.

It is amazing to begin to see the world through Adelina’s eyes. Things that have been right here all along are suddenly new and wonderful to her. The cars and buses are within view and we’ve seen the groups take walks clear up to the gate. But Adelina hadn’t shown any interest in them until she looked at them with us or maybe it was the influence of the two car rides she’s taken with us. Anyhow, now she thinks they are fascinating and when we walk to the gate she is mesmerized by the cars and buses, especially the big ones. She is the same way with birds and insects making sure to point them all out to us.

Best of all is to see how she lights up when she sees us coming. She quickens her pace, and our hearts melt to see her gorgeous smile. Her demeanor around us has changed. She has always been smiley and happy, but now she has a relaxed, contented feel that is much more natural. Trust seems to be developing, and it is so wonderful!! She doesn’t cry so much when we leave, and we think this is because we have been visiting so consistently. She is okay to say goodbye as long as we do say goodbye and give hugs and kisses before leaving. Once, she got scooted into the bathroom with the others prior to our saying goodbye. So we were waiting for her to come out before leaving, but I guess she thought we had gone without saying goodbye. The caregiver brought her out and she had obviously been crying hard. Steve consoled her (I was on the phone at the time) and she calmed down. We then did our hugs, kisses, and said goodbye, and she seemed much better after that. She went in to dinner without any further tears. What a precious girl! We can’t begin to tell you how wonderful she is!! Well, we can try I guess. LOL